The Day We Shared Ashlie’s Life—and What It Taught Us About Love and Loss
By Erin Maroon
Easter Sunday, April 5, 2015, was a day of joy, resurrection, and new beginnings…the day we announced our pregnancy with Ashlie. It will forever be an Easter we’ll never forget.
The moment I learned I was pregnant, I started thinking of the announcement. People had been waiting for YEARS for us to have babies, so I knew this would come as a total shock to many of our friends. It had to be good. Tony and I both love to sing, so I knew we had to incorporate that.
“I hope this baby can sing,” is the first thing I told Tony after the initial shock wore off. We laughed, but then I realized THAT was the announcement! Because the group Maroon 5 was popular, and we share the same last name, we decided to call ourselves Maroon 3 and start the “tour” in October, when Ashlie was due.
We were at my parents’ house, arranging the microphones when my cousin arrived. After we told him our news, he offered his congratulations but then questioned us announcing it at all.
“My friend lost his baby at 20 weeks,” he told us. “It was hard because he’d already told everyone they were having a baby. Maybe it’s better you don’t say anything at all. You don’t want to jinx it.”
Although we brushed off his comments, we all know how my pregnancy ended. But did it actually end?
In Christianity, Easter Sunday is a celebration of Jesus’ rising from the dead, signifying the victory of life over death. It would have been so easy to give up after Ashlie’s death. No one would have questioned it. But I kind of love that, out of all the days on the calendar, we announced Ashlie’s life on one that celebrates victory over death.
Nothing we do, say, or pray for will bring her back. So although I wouldn’t exactly call living without her a “win,” her legacy lives on to offer the gift of time to families facing loss. Getting back up and making a difference despite the heartache? That’s our victory over death.
And if this is how it has to be, I’m here for it.
With love,
Erin
